one might say we're banned from that church
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I would ride that face into the sunset
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Randomize
