So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
