i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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