I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
