Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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