this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
