4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize
