I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
