Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize