I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Randomize
