I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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