508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize