So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
