I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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