it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
