Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
