What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
