Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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