im drinking this country out of the recession.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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