I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
