My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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