All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
