Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
