Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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