I want to make a zoo with you.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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