ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize