Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Blood and glitter go together right?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I'm way too hungover for life right now
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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