Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
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