It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
