I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
drinking out of a sandbucket again
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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