Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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