i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
