idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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