my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I'm drive I can fine osifer
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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