I wish life had little blips of pornography
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Watching her eat just hurts me
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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