I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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