To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
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