Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
