She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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