is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Randomize
