Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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