dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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