I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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