You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
