the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Text me some of your sweat
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
