Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize