I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
