I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Randomize
