I wish I only lived at night.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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