just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
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