so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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